2010-04-21 Pic of the Day!

Tummy time! Here's a Two-Fer :)

See me holding my head up?  Doesn't last too long, but I'm getting there!

2010-04-20 Pic of the Day!

I was feeling under the weather yesterday, but I managed to get this on my cell.  Better late than never, right?

2010-04-19 Pic of the Day!

2010-04-18 Pic of the Day!

2010-04-17 Pic of the Day!

KEEEEEYAH!

Pic of the Day - Funny Friday!

For the last week i've been sending coworkers a picture of Lexie everyday.  I thought i'd expand this to the first feature of my blog!  SOOO, starting today I'm going to do my best to take and post a picture of Alexsa every day.  Friday's pic will be sure to make you laugh!

Withouth further ado, today's Pic of the Day :)

And here were a few that you missed: :)

Two Month Wellness Check

Alexsa had her 2 month check up yesterday.  Her Chunk-a-Monk status has been demoted.  She is in the 75th percentile for height and 25th for weight! (her head is 50%) So I guess now she's Skina-Monk. :)

She is happy and healthy - and the doctor was happy.  We have to be better about giving her tummy time - her head is pretty flat and her arms aren't as strong as they could be, but other than that we're good!

We are going to spread out her vaccines, so she only got 1 shot (HiB).  I'm glad for it, because it was so heartbreaking to see her cry in pain. This was the first time she got hurt.  I got choked, but didn't cry.  I think Barry was hurting more than me - he actually took her from me when she was crying.  She goes back on May 6th for another vaccine, but Daddy will be taking her to that one. I can't believe that some doctors are ok with shooting 2 month olds up with up to 8 different vaccines in 1 day! Talk about chemical overload, not to mention the war that the little one's immune system has to wage, creating ALL those antibodies at once!  Sure we'll have to pay a co-pay for each visit, but at least if she has a reaction we'll know why. I'm so grateful we found our doctors. (This is a no-judgement zone, so if you chose a different route for your children, I understand!)

We got home from her appointment about 3:30/4:00, which is usually when she's waking up from her afternoon nap.  She was very quiet while Barry and I ate dinner, but never actually fell asleep for more than a few minutes at a time.  By the time 8:00 rolled around, she was SO tired, I decided to try and feed her one more time and put her down.  She wasn't interested in me at all, so i changed and swaddled her and put her in her crib. She was asleep almost instantly. 
Because she went down so early, i was preparing myself to wake up about 4.  The cats found a bell toy around 3, which got me up to put it in a drawer (GRRRR), then I was up about 6:15.  She still wasn't making a sound - I almost had Barry check on her, but she made a peep or two, so i relaxed until my alarm went off. Just as I was getting ready to pick her up to feed, she started stirring - about 6:50.  My baby slept for over 10 hours. WOW.

Two Months Old!

WOW! I can't believe you're two months already.  It has been a whirl wind and the last 2 months have flown by.  You are growing so fast!!  At 2 months:

You spend the day with Daddy because I went back to work 2 weeks ago.  When I come home you smile because you're happy to see me!  You make my day and I can't stop kissing your sweet smelling skin.

You are getting stronger and are getting pretty good at holding your head up. You're not 100% but you 'hold your own'. :)

You are my sweet sleeper.  You consistantly sleep 7-8 hours at night, which is so great for letting me get good rest for work.  Thank you, Baby!

You love your bath!

You're drinking anywhere from 3-5 oz at a meal, and like to eat every 2-3 hours during the day. We call you our Chunk-a-Monk. :)

Alexsa, I love you so much. I love what you've given our family.  Being a Mom is the coolest feeling in the world.  You know that feeling when you're next in line to ride that exciting new roller coaster? Or when you get your learner's permit? Or when you and your love experience your first kiss? When you take the first bite of an amazing dish? Or when you say "I Do"?  You take those feelings, mush them together into one awesome feeling and constantly multiply it.  That's the closest I can describe how much I love you. 

I can't wait for tomorrow. :)

Ahhhh....

Guess who's baby slept through the night last night? 

MINE! :)

Alexsa went down at her normal 10:00 last night.  It took her a bit to get to sleep, finally drifting at around 10:30, but when my alarm woke me up at 6:45 instead of my baby, a big smile came across my face.  Sure she made little noises here and there, but nothing crazy.  So on the night of her 8 week birthday, she gave me an awesome gift: almost 8 full hours of sleep.

I had a theory that I was waking her up too early to feed... I'd hear her every morning between 3 and 5 making inking noises like she was waking up so I'd pick her up, change her diaper and feed her.  I never wanted her to wake up so much that she would start crying and wake up Barry.  However she never seemed too interested and would only latch for about 15 minutes before puckering her lips.  So last night I put it in my mind that i'd let her go a bit longer and see what happened.  I don't even remember her making too much noise at all.  I actually did my 'middle of the night feed' at 7am this morning.  She ate well, I put her back down and got ready for work.  Barry said she didn't wake up again until 10:45!  WOW!

Lets see if we can make this a habit. :)

Easter 2010

We enjoyed a beautiful relaxing day yesterday at my Mom's.  I showed Alexsa off at Alexsa and I went to church with my parents, then went over to Mom and Dad's for a ham dinner and great time with family.  Alexsa looked SO adorable in her Easter Dress!

After we ate the boys wanted us to hide eggs, but we were all feeling very lazy relaxing on the porch, so we hid them in the porch instead of in the yard. ;).  This made hiding much more fun, though, because the eggs weren't just sitting in the grass.  The boys LOVED it!  After they found them all they wanted us to do it again (of course.)  Denise said, "Why don't you hide them for the adults?"  You would've thought they were going to Disney - it was the best idea EVER.  So shortly after they ran into the living room we hear "READY!!!!"  Ashton and Braydon couldn't stand the suspense as we searched for eggs.  It was so much fun I think we'll do it again next year.  And Ashton was so smart, he remembered where they were all hidden to when there was just a few left he could give us clues as to where the remaining eggs were.

Alexsa was such a good baby all day.  She didn't sleep much, but was content just hanging out in her Aunts' arms or just laying on her blanket.  She even played a game of Hullabaloo with Aunt Christy and the boys and won! :)

By the time we got home it was about 8:00 and Lexie was quite cranky.  I figured she was tired so we tried to put her down with her binky, but she wouldn't have it.  That's what I get for not following the bedtime routine!  I picked her back up and walked around, but she wouldn't calm down. She was fed, changed and burped and still a fuss.  Sooo, what calms her down? Nothing.  Putting her on the floor blanket with her bink.  That's it.  She wanted to be left alone again.  Is this my kid??  Believe me, i'm not complaining, but seriously? It seems so weird how she prefers to just chill instead of cuddle.  But it worked out.  We had quiet time from 8:30-9:30, we fed and changed, and she went right down at 10:00, quietly falling asleep about 10:20. 

When Will the Bubble Burst?! Never, I Hope!

Alexsa has been really great about going down to sleep at night for the past few days.  Someone gave me the advice to lay her down and just say "Goodnight", and that was it.  Who would've thought it would work so well?!

I'm trying to create a night routine.  Its not solid, but I think its familiar enough that she's taking to it.  We start winding down around 9:00.  Right now since she just lays there anyway, its more of Barry and I winding down than Alexsa.  We lower the lights, turn the TV down or off, and speak in softer voices. Then, by 10 we feed, change, and go to bed.  I give her her binky if she wants it and usually only have to put it back in her mouth 2 or 3 times before she doesn't need it anymore and both Mommy and Baby are asleep within 15-30 minutes. (Her basinette is still next to the bed.)

Last night she had a bottle around 8, so at 10 she still wasn't acting hungry.  I gave her my boobs anyway, and she ate for just a few minutes each.  I wondered if i was tapped out, so i tried to give her some formula, of which she was not interested at all. So we changed her diaper and laid her down.  The whole time I'm giving myself the prep talk that I'll be up in a few hours and be tired all day tomorrow for having to wake up 2-3 times.  Well, she went down really well and we were asleep shortly after 10.  My bladder woke me up, (which was a first since having Alexsa, BTW) rolled to look at the clock and freaked out when it said 5:35! WHAT!?  Did my 7 week old baby really just sleep for over 7 hours!?  Its 5:40 now and she's still not making a peep.  I leaned over to make sure she was still breathing a few times.  Now i'm awake just waiting for her to make a sound.  When she finally started to ink about 5:45 it was the best sound in the world.  I finally got up to pee and get ready for her and we had our first feeding of the day at 6:00!  WOW. 

When I had a really smooth pregnancy, Barry and I thought we'd have a difficult birth.  When our birth went really well, we thought for sure we'd have a difficult baby.  Now that she's so easy-peasy, I'm certain she's going to be a hellian as a toddler.  I mean, we've got to fall through this cloud we're living on sometime, right??

Back to Work

I had my first day back to work today.  Alexsa and I got to bed by 11:00 last night.  She woke up for her night feeding at 5:30 (6 1/2 hrs!!) She only ate for about 15 minutes then went right back down, so i was able to sleep for another 40 minutes or so before getting up at 6:45 for work.  I got ready for work then pumped right before I left (3 oz!).  I only shed a few tears when saying goodbye and then a little on the way to work, and once I got there I was pretty good.

I 'traded' with Barry at his school and it was only then that I really missed her.  She was so close to me (in the car seat), yet I couldn't pick her up to hold her! 

I think she missed me too, because my independent baby has been very content cuddly with me all night :)

So, 1 day down, 4,679 to go...

All the Single Ladies!

The Beyonce song has been in my head all morning. 

Anytime I think about how hard it is to take care of a newborn, I almost immediately think about the single parents out there.  I have SO MUCH respect for them, especially with more than one child. UGH.

Barry got called to a teaching job this morning so I have Alexsa by myself today.  Just chilling at the house isn't a big deal, but we have to go out today, which means I needed to shower and make myself presentable.  The thought of taking a shower w/ the risk of leaving Alexsa wailing scared the poo out of me and even thought about forgoing the shower. But I knew the day would have to come sooner or later, so after our morning feeding i laid her in her basinette and took a shower.  She was SO good!  I love how independent she is (and it scares me at the same time!)  She just lay there all content, and I even had an extra minute or so to just relax in the shower before turning off the water.  This is how happy she was when I came out of the bathroom:

Then I was able to get dressed and blowdry my hair before she was ready for some attention. 

She's so great!

Six Week Checkup and other Ramblings

I had my 6 week post partum checkup yesterday.  Everything is pretty much back to normal! :)  I still have a few stitches left to disolve, but I am free to be a normal person again. :)  Sex? Yes please.

However, at the checkup, he noticed a mole on my back that makes him nervous, so i have to go back in a month to get it removed.  What sucks is that its going to leave a nasty scar. :(  BUT better to get it removed now before it turns into cancer later.

I also got the go ahead to go back to work, so I start back up on Monday.  Its a week earlier than what we planned, but I figure we can save my PTO for if she's sick or if we want to take a long weekend trip, to say, Monroe, NC. :)  I'm looking forward to going back but I already miss her.  I miss her when she takes a long nap so I know once I'm at my desk i'll want nothing more than to be back at home.

Its amazing how independent she seems to be already.  Many times when she's fussy and we can't figure out why, if we just put her down on the couch or her activity mat, she calms right down.  She actually seems to prefer to be left alone!  How crazy is that?

On Saturday, Barry and I are leaving Alexsa with my Mom to go to a wedding.  Its the first time (other than a quick trip to Walmart when she was a few days old) that she'll be away from both Barry and me.  I'm excited about it!

Did I mention that I had my biopsy on my eye? Last friday they took a chunk of the black thing out of my eyelid - we should get the results back in 2 more weeks.  Hopefully its nothing!

Barry is just amazing with Alexsa.  He has much more patience than I expected and he is actually really sensitive.  Last night he got home from school and I had put her down already.  He was dissapointed because he wanted to hold her.  This from the guy that never even wants to be in the same room as an infant.  I was afraid that the baby would put alot of strain on our relationship (which, i'm sure we'll have our moments) but it seems so far that Alexsa has brought us so much closer together.  :)

Realization

After another night of Alexsa going to sleep at 1:00am, Barry made a realization: She has chosen her schedule. It seems no matter now much or little she sleeps during the day, she goes to bed about 1:00am, wakes up between 4:30 and 5:30 to feed, again at 7 or 8, then  we nap until 9 or 10am.  We start our go to bed process at 9pm with a quiet feeding then we swaddle her up and rock her for a bit.  As soon as she seems asleep, we put her down.  Ten minutes later, she's wide awake!  This process repeats until she gets hungry again about midnight and by then I'm so tired that I give in and fall asleep in the bed with her in my arms after her feed.  Sure we're getting sleep by not getting up until after 9, but come April 5th when I go back to work, I will not be a happy Mommy. SOOO, how do I coax her to going to bed earlier? Keep her up ALL day? Then I get nothing done and the house goes to pot even more than it already is.  Any other suggestions?  (And I the thought of putting whiskey on her paci has crossed my mind more than once...)

From Her Cousin's Perspective

• Braydon watched me change Alexsa a few weeks ago.  When I took off the diaper, he exlcaimed "Where is IT?  How does she PEE!?"
• Alexsa yawned and Braydon got a glimpse of the inside of her mouth.  Braydon asked "Where are her teeth?"
• Ashton saw me nursing Alexsa yesterday. I was mostly covered and he just came in and out. Jason (Ashotn's dad) asked him what we were doing.  Ashton said "Alexsa is eating out of Aunt Mandi's stomach."

Heehee...

Schedule? What Schedule?

Ok, please tell me how to get Alexsa on a schedule. 
Night before last she was up until 3:00, then up almost every hour to feed. It sucked.

Last night she, again, would NOT go down so at 12:30 Barry just let her cry it out.  15 minutes later of uncontrolable wailing I couldn't take it anymore so I picked her up.  She was so worn out she fell almost immediately asleep, so swaddled her up and she slept for 5 hours or so.

Today she was awake ALL day except for a few moments when she's trying to eat and falls asleep on the boob, only to wake up 10 minutes later screaming hungry.  She did not want to be put down AT ALL.  Its 6:43 and she finally went down.  Now she's going to be awake in a few hours ready to be up all night, i just know it. 

AHHH!!!  Any suggestions would be fantastic.

My Angel is Here!

"Today Alexsa (note the new spelling!) is 1 week!  What a whirlwind of a week. "

LOL!  That's when I started this blog... 3 weeks ago!  Sorry for the delay... Today is Alexsa's 1 month birthday!

Without further ado... her birth story:

At our 40 week appointment, my Dr and I decided to induce on Monday night, Feb 8th (40w2d).  Originally our induction date was the 13th (41weeks).  When I told Barry about it, he had concerns that we were inducing too early.  We went to see Dr. Raspa Monday morning... Barry was worried that the reason we were inducing earlier was because of the doctor's schedule.  With the anxiety of wanting to get her out + the fact that my grandpa has been waiting patiently for her and was leaving on the 13th, I was READY to go on the 8th.  Of course, Dr. Raspa said he was going to be out of town the weekend of the 13th.  I was heartbroken that it wasn't going to happen that day.  So the Dr. left us to talk it out and we decided to try a 1/2 way approach - spend the night in the hospital with Cervadil to ripen my cervix.  If i didn't go into labor that night we would go home and just wait it out.

Well that night was hell.  the Cervadil was very uncomfortable and I bearly slept.  Nothing happened. About 8:30 the next morning I heard Dr. Raspa talking outside my door and felt a trickle 'down there'.  I thought , "Hm. what's that?" but didn't say anything.  He came in to check me and while down there interestingly enough said "Hm, what's that?"  They tested the fluid and sure enough my water broke on its own.  But because I wasn't in active labor, they had to give me Petocin to get me started. 

They started the Petocin at 10:30 Tuesday morning and by 3:00, I was still only 3cm dialated with contractions coming what felt like every 3-5 minutes.  They were painful and just down right horrible.  My plan was to give birth under a squat bar, which meant I would have had to go natural to be able to squat when the time came to push.  But by 4:30, the contractions were so painful and the only way I was able to deal with them was on my knees or standing over the bed, yet I was so exhausted my legs didn't want to hold me up.  I broke and asked for the epidural.  It was the most defeating feeling I had ever felt. But Dr. Solomon, the adiminster of the epidural, became my best friend.  I barely felt the procedure and was almost immediately pain feel.  It was the best decision I could've made. 

At 7:30 (i think) they checked me again and I was only 5cm or so, so most of my family went home. But when they checked 2 hrs later i was at 9-10!  So Barry, my  mom, and my sister started taking bets as to what time she would be born.  Dr. Raspa came in a short while later and joked around with us about the bet. They got everything ready and with my husband on my left and my mom on my right, I started pushing at 10:15 or so and Alexsa was born at 10:50pm on February 9th, 2010! (Apparently I am a very good pusher. :))  I never had the urge to push, but thanks to the wonders of the epidural, I was actually laughing though pushes!  The nurse on duty did most of the push coaching while Raspa sat behind her.  At one point he was playing with his phone.  Barry joked and asked if he was texting someone. He said, 'no, playing Tetris.  I'd play Bejeweled but I'd get too wrapped up.' LOL! Right when she was crowning, everyone was talking about how they could see her.  I was the only one that couldn't! So I actually asked for a mirror.  I thought i'd be grossed out and not want to see, but it was actually pretty cool.  They placed her on my chest right away.  She reminded me of an old man. (Her face was so swollen, slimy and purply.

After they cleaned her up a bit, I got to hold her longer than normal.  The reason was because as she came out, her nose caught and gave me what Dr. Raspa called a "starburst tear." UGH.  It took them over an hour to stitch me up.  I didn't really notice - i was holding my baby girl.  At one point, Barry accidentally caught a glimpse and had to get some fresh air.

We brought Alexsa Jade home about 1:00 on Thursday, Feb 11th.  We're sleep deprived and learning her personality, but doing well! 

Now that I have this out of the way I hope to post more regularly on the day to day happenings of being a new Mom.  Yay!

My Favorite Pregnancy Dream

What? 2 in one day!? I know, i'm on a roll. :)

I have to write down this dream because it's quite funny.

Sunday night I dreamt that my water broke in my sleep.  (Talk of how full moons can affect your amniotic fluid must've gotten my dream juices flowing.)  I "woke up" to a wet bed and wondered if i was just really sweaty or if my water had broken.  When I went to the bathroom, sure enough my water broke.
So I called Labor and Delivery, as instructed, to let them know.  Wouldn't you know, they outsourced to India!  A highly-accented man came on the line and didn't know what to do.  I got so frustrated with him. "You don't know anything!"  I screamed then said "Look, I'm just coming, OK? You better be ready for me!" and hung up on him.

When I actually woke up from my dream, i was quite dissapointed that the bed was dry.  Oh well. ;)

T Minus 3 days?

Well, here I am, 3 days from our due date, and I have not felt ONE contraction.  I was in such a funk for the last week because i was CERTAIN she would come early.  So on Monday I put Alexa in Uterine Time Out. I decided I wasn't going to talk too much about it and told my family not to ask me how i'm feeling anymore (as they had been like every 5 minutes).  Tuesday was a much better day and I actually felt good walking around.  Today is still in question.

If you don't follow me on facebook, at my last appointment I was 70% effaced but 0cm dialated.  My next appointment is friday and because my doctor isn't an OB, he typically doesn't check for dilation.  I'm juggling with making him check me or just letting it go. I don't want him to go through with it to just learn that nothing's changed.  My family, of course, wants to know what's up, and if I have progressed it would be a nice confidence boost. 

I find it interesting that my pregnancy is so different from my mom's and Denise's.  Both of them had early babies that were small.  At my last ultrasound, around 35 or 36 weeks, Alexa was already 6lb 6 oz and had a melon head.  Now that I'm going to full term (or beyond!) I'm nervous that I won't be able to do a natrual birth under the squat bar like i'd hoped.  Even my doctor, who had been saying that my hips could handle a big baby, was reasurring me last appointment that there are great OBs on hand in case of a C-section.  I know i shouldn't feel inadequate, but I fear I will if it doesn't go a certain way. (She's already not behaving how i'd like her too!)  I know she will come on her time.. but i feel like i'm going to be pregnant for the rest of my life! (And I'd really like a beer, please!!)

The Long Overdue Pregancy Update

I know, I know... this is way overdue.

Yes, I'm still pregnant.  Tomorrow I'll be 37 weeks.  I think she dropped yesterday - so i'm hoping she's ready to come out soon!  We had an ultrasound a 2 weeks ago and her head was measuring in the 81st percentile and she was weighing about 6 1/2 lbs. She's going to be huge, so i'm ready for her to come out!  I'm very much hoping for a Jan. 29th birthday for Alexa.  My Grandpa will be here, and its the 1 year anniversary of Grandma Hart's death. It would be an amazingly wonderful thing to replace such a hard day for all of us.

(This is at 32 1/2 weeks)

My pregnancy has been almost TOO easy.  It really makes me nervous about the birth - i'm way overdue for something funky to happen.  I had barely ANY morning sickness, I've been fairly energetic the entire time, and I've only gained about 20 pounds.  She  moves ALL the time and it's just been all around a pleasant experience.  My belly button didn't even pop! (But i have more than my share of stretch marks. :P)  My only drawback is that the Doctor found sugar in my urine about a month ago, so i've been restricted to minimal carbs.  That's been the hardest part!!  I didn't do so good during the holidays, but I still only gained 1 lb.  over christmas.  Not so bad for a preganant lady whose SUPPOSED to gain weight!

We had our showers last week - the ladies at work gave me one and my sisters and mom gave us one.  We are so lucky to have such generous friends and family!  We've gotten everything from our stroller to the crib to onsies - everything we'll need - and have barely had to spend a dime.  Our first actual purchase will be tonight, when I buy our breast pump, and even then the majority of it will be paid for by gift cards!  I don't even know how to express how blessed Alexa is - she's going to be one spoiled little girl!

Barry has gotten sooo much better. :)  He installed the car seat this morning and got it checked for correct installation.  SOOO we are ready to bring her home from the hospital!  He's going to be such a great Dad - i can't wait to see him snuggle with his baby girl.

In other news (sort of) - my sister is pregnant too!  This is her third; she has 2 beautiful boys already.  We were all hoping for a girl - but she and Jason are going to have their 3rd boy!  His big brothers are calling him "Vader".  Who knows, mabye it'll stick? (ha!)  So Alexa and Vader will only be 5 months apart!

Its been so long since i've posted anything - am I forgetting something?  If so, ask me and I'll reply in the comments!

I'm Not Dead, I Swear

Hey all!  We're doing well, Alexa is still incubating nicely. 

On Nov 6th, work decided to go into hyper drive and has JUST started to slow. Therefore my usual blogging time (when I'm bored at work) became nonexistent.  Today I'm making a special stop here just to let you know I'm still alive and doing well, just rediculously busy at work.  I'm hoping this short post will encourage me to post a longer update soon.  Thanks!!

Eye Appointment/Pediatricians

About the time I became pregnant, or shortly after, I noticed this weird bump on my lower eye lid. I showed Doctor Raspa at each appointment and he blew it off as a mole. Well, it seemed to grow, so I decided to go to my eye doctor to have him check it out. He didn't like the way it looked and referred me to an eye surgeon for a biopsy. I had my consult with Dr. Nicolitz today, who is the eye surgeon that I was referred to. After looking at the ‘lesion’, he said almost instantly that he would like a biopsy. Because it was so dark and because it’s so close to the tear duct, they want to just make sure its not melanoma. It is possible that it’s just a mole that got darker because of the pregnancy hormones, but they want to be sure. Unfortunately, they can’t do the biopsy until after Alexa is born, so after delivery we’ll have to call and make an appointment. It’s a simple procedure they do in-office, but I’ll have to be numbed up and then patched, so I’ll need a ride. (With needles that close to my eye, I might need a valium too!) If it comes back as something they want to remove completely, it will mean surgery under full anesthesia, so HOPEFLLY it won’t come to that.

In other news, we found our pediatrician(s)! Barry and I went to an open house last night at Progressive Pediatrics and absolutely fell in love with the doctors there. They are certified in Holistic Medicine, so they are focused on keeping our children well more so than just dealing with them only when they’re sick. They seemed to be on our wavelength for much of our thinking (breast feeding, vaccines, etc) so Barry and I are both super excited that we found them. One of them is a certified Lactation Consultant also, so if I have trouble she’ll be there. They emphasized that they are ultimately there for the child, but that they are our advisors, and that they leave the decisions up to the parents. They are HUGE on educating the parents, so their after hours calls are less than a typical office because the parents. I like that. Unfortunately they don’t visit St. Vincent’s (where I'll be delivering), but they were confident in the neonatologists in attendance there and they’ll be in constant communication with them. Every question we asked, they gave the answers I was hoping to hear (ex: appointments every 30 minutes, not every 15 and then a long wait). The only bummer is that they don’t have Saturday or evening hours, but they are definitely family focused, which means they feel their family is important, too (hence the hours). Yay for finding a great fit for us!

Flour Baby!

From babycenter.com:

"Is it normal to feel clumsy during pregnancy?

Yes. Many women feel ungainly when they're pregnant, particularly in their last few months."

Well, this is rediculous...

I decided to make pumpkin bread. (This recipe sans the clove.)After over an hour and a half of cutting, cooking, peeling and pureeing the pumpkin, adding the eggs, sugar, oil, and water, then maticulously measuring the flour, baking soda, cinnamon, ginger, etc I opened the cabinet above my dry mix to put my flour away when a can of Tomato Basil soup decided to escape the cabinet and PLOP! directly into my flour mix. As you can see, flour went EVERYWHERE. I really wish I had a camera on me because it was probably effing hilarious. But now, after all that measuring, i don't know how much flour and spices I just lost. So what do I do? I sweep the floor, then measure the dirty stuff (over 1/2 a cup!). Then I just remove a 1/2 a cup of the wet stuff, mix and bake! It turned out SO GOOD. :)

The loaf is still in the oven, but I had a bit left, so I made a dozen mini muffins and they turned out YUMMY!

Somer Thompson

Those who live locally here in Jax know about Somer Thompson. If you don't, please click here, then read on.

North Florida has been heartbroken for the past 72 hours, first with her disappearance, then with the discovery of Somer's body. When the story first broke, I was annoyed that they interrupted my Big Bank Theory to talk about a missing girl that never came home from school. Then when Barry said (who, at first, was also annoyed) "What if it was Alexa?" my annoyance quickly dissipated.

I admit, I kept my distance. Even though it unfolded in Orange Park, minutes from where I grew up, I felt as I did with any other story on the news. It was a "There goes another one" attitude. Then, yesterday morning, I listened to Somer's mom give a news conference on the way to work. Her voice was so... distraught. I've never heard heartbreak, real sorrow, like I did from her.

Then, last night, they found the body but couldn't confirm it was Somer. So again, I kept my distance - they don't know yet.

But listening to the news on the way to work this morning, they confirmed the body found in the landfill was indeed Somer Thompson, a 7 yr old who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. I've never let a news story affect me like this. I sobbed all the way to work. I'm realizing that, as a parent, you see the news in a completely different light. Prior to Alexa, I could sympathize and say "I can imagine what they're going through." Now I realize that I really didn't have a fucking clue. No one can tell you how scary it is going to be as a parent. No one can warn you about these things. Does it get any easier to listen to the news? Knowing that the family on the screen really isn't any different than us and, just like my family, doesn't deserve to feel that horrific grief?

Somer, I didn't know you. But I know that your mother loves you. Your brothers and sisters love you. And now, a whole town, state, and country love you. Please dance with the angels, and give my Grandma a big hug from me.

Honest Scrap Award

Alix at Casa Hice has bestowed upon me this Honest Scrap Award...


The Honest Scrap Award requires that I list 10 honest things about myself, and then I have to pass it on to 7 people with blogs that I find brilliant in content and/or design, or those who have
encouraged me. So here goes:


1. I'm pregnant with my first baby. (Duh!)

2. I'm scared to death that Alexa is going to end up completely screwed up and hate me.

3. My husband thinks I eat too much sugar and that our baby is going to be born diabetic. If he only knew how much sugar I really ate...

4. At work, I'm not as happy in my current position as I was at the branch, but I feel 'stuck' here.

5. I want sex a lot more now that I'm pregnant, but am getting it a lot less.

6. I cuss a lot in the car at other drivers. I mean... A LOT.

7. One of my favorite things to do is sit by a campfire on a chilly night and stare at the flames. Especially if its a starry night, I have hot chocolate in my hands, and I'm surrounded by friends and family.

8. I don't know how to program my MP3 player with play lists. I think if i had an iPod it'd be much easier.

9. I'm constantly worried about money. It's probably not healthy.

10.I wish I would read more. I have so many books on my plate that I started and haven't finished.


On to the 7 people. I don't have that many blogs that I follow, so you're pretty much all tagged. :)


1. Angelle @ Crabby Mama

2. Rhiannon @ DaveRhi

3. Laurie @ Welcome to the Madhouse

4. Nikki @ Tales of a Sweet Life

5. Katie @ The Palmaro Diaries

6. Joanie @ Joanie's Random Ramblings

7. Garret @ RV'ing

Ode to 100 Grand

Oh, 100 Grand, how I love thee. Your perfect combination of crispy crunchies and chewy caramel makes me overbound with joy. I am saddened that I only have a "Fun Size" of your chewy, yummy goodness, but am grateful for your existence, however short it was. I thoroughly enjoyed created 10 bites out of the 3 that it would typically take to consume you, to only prolong your wonderment.

You are so seductive, oh 100 Grand. It is taking all of the power within me to not take the long trek across the building to find another Fun Size to partake in. I must resist.... I... can't....

mmmm........ *Crunch*

Roller Coaster of Emotions

The weekend started with a BUST. Going to bed on Friday night, Barry and I had a conversation that made me cry, and once I started I couldn't stop. It was a serious discussion about parenting and money (fears, expectations, etc.)but it wasn't something that would typically cause me try cry uncontrollably. But there I was, gushing, with no end in sight. I went to sleep upset, something I hate doing. I woke up early to let the dogs out in OP, threw on some sweat pants and a sweatshirt, and was out and back home by 8:00am. I crawled back to bed and slept another 2 hours. I woke up in a funk. I didn't feel like going anywhere, but didn't feel like being at home either. I didn't care about what was on TV, or even what I was going to eat for breakfast, even though I could feel my stomach growling. Barry finally asked me if I was OK, I said no and started crying again. He asked if it was him. I answered "No" but I really wasn't sure. I couldn't talk about it... didn't want to talk about it. I just wanted to wallow in my funk. Then I realized that I CRAVED Barry to hug me, touch me, kiss me, whatever, but I felt like I couldn't ask him to do it; I wanted him to want to do it on his own. At one point he gave me a hug and it seemed that I clung to him like I was going to loose him or something. (I don't know if he noticed.) It was so bazaar. I looked at my bed and thought how great it would be to just lay down again, but at the same time, didn't want to waste my time there - I knew as soon as I laid down that I would be bored. I never felt this way in my entire life before - very strange.
So, about 3, I got out of my sweats and dressed for the day. We headed to Orange Park for another dog sitting session. We found a cat that was lost and that perked me up for a short while. Then we headed to a friends, I got to watch the Gators win (barely!) and I slowly felt like my old self again.
On the way back to let the dogs out for the last time that day, I was finally able to talk to Barry about my funk. I described what I felt and he said I sounded depressed. Hm. In my 29 years of life, it was the first time I had ever felt that. Depression. (And it only lasted a 1/2 day - makes me feel very lucky.) Then I was able to tell him that I realized that I just missed his touch so much. It must have been an accumulation of a few days of unconscious preggo-induced thoughts of a poor body image or something... who knows? So as soon as I was able to talk about it, the weekend went MUCH better than it started. Sunday was a great day of spending time with family and friends, and the weekend ended with a great bang (If you know what i mean! :))

Sympathy Bitchiness?

Ok, I've heard of sympathy weight, where the husband gains weight along with his pregnant wife, but is there such a thing as Sympathy Bitchiness?

Barry will blame my pregnancy on any little bickering I do (For example, when I have to put away our Calphalon scissors for the 15th effing time, or when I come home to an xBox-playing husband when the sink is FULL of dishes and the dishwasher is empty.) I don't see this as being pregnant, I see this as being a working wife wanting to come home to a decent house. Can you blame me? But anyway, I digress.

Night before last we were driving to Orange Park (a 25 minute trek across the river) to dog sit for our friends who are on vacation. We got all the way over the bridge when I realized we forgot the house key. ARGH!!! I HATE wasting the gas and time (especially since SYTYCD was on!) so I got a bit annoyed. PLUS Barry drives like an 85 year old Grandma, and most of the time I am very patient. I just happened to make a comment this time after making our U-turn. Something along the lines of "Can you at least go the speed limit on the way home?" Well, he blew up! He went off the reservation and then ANYTHING I said just made it worse. So I stopped talking. And of course that made it worse too.

Finally, after about 5 minutes he was like "aren't you going to say something?"

"I didn't know if I was allowed." (Secretly I wanted the argument to last until we got home because in his rant he said that I should just stay home and he'd go back alone, which is what I wanted in the first place!)

"Well... blah blah blah" He calmed down and apologized.

After I knew the storm had blown over I made a comment I have made in the past: "You're such a woman sometimes."

He knew exactly what I meant and didn't even argue.

23 Weeks Randomness

We had our monthly check-up on Friday. Everything is going well! Saturday marked 23 weeks. First, I keep forgetting to announce that we've finally decided on a name. So, without further ado, introducing...

Alexa Jade Swedlow

Now that that's out of the way, on to the update:

Alexa is coming along! The doctor says she's very active, and I can concur with as much as I feel her doing her gymnastics in my ute. He measured my belly and said I was running a little big - hopefully that means she'll come earlier, not that she'll be a big baby! I'm REALLY hoping she inherits my shoulders, not Barry's. Barry has amazon shoulders - OUCH!

I'm doing pretty great too. My lower back hurts quite often, and the doctor said it's because my hips are out of alignment and one leg becomes longer than the other. He gave me an exercise to do that should alleviate that, so I'll work on it. Other than my back, though, I'm feeling pretty good!

On Saturday morning I went into cleaning mode. I don't clean that often, but I had high hopes that I would get a shit-ton of stuff done. I ended up focusing on the guest bathroom. I cleaned that bathroom like it had never cleaned before. I went from dusting every little nook and organizing under the sink to actually taking a soapy rag to the base boards! It looked as good as the day we moved in, but my back paid for it later that day after being on the floor all morning. Nesting? maybe, but it seems to early for that.

Today I watched a Baby Story on TLC, and later watched bits of Knocked Up. Both times right after the delivery and the baby was placed in the mom's arms, I got teared up. I can't wait until that moment more than almost any other. I can only imagine right now the overwhelming emotion that I'll feel when I see Alexa for the first time. Just imagining it makes me sniffle!

Something I enjoy about being pregnant - That giddy in-love feeling. Its like when you first start seeing someone and you've just left a great date. You go over the moments in your mind and feel such excitement and anticipation. I feel like that when I rub my tummy. :)

And My Day Was Going So Well...

It goes without mentioning that it's Friday - so 100 bonus points for that.

Second, I went to bed before 10 last night so i could wake up a few minutes early to eat breakfast. I actually did get up early and got ready quickly enough to make myself a YUMMY Egg & Cheddar grilled sammie for breakfast. and I still got to work on time!

Third, we got our first Virtual Branch customer! As most of you know, I am the Virtual Branch Office Manager at my bank, among other things. And since going live on August 8th, every application has failed (rightly so, but still). Then, as I was checking my reports this morning, I didn't see my typical 'denied'. It says "In Progress" Wha-what?! YESSS!!! So what if it's our CFO's father. He's 4 hours away, and if a 94 year old man can open an account online - anyone can do it!

Also, I've got awesome leftovers from barry's yummy porkchop dinner last night. As soon as I'm done w/ this post i'm gonna chow down.

Then why, oh why, after having such a great morning, must I get this:

This makes me so sad. Now I can only enjoy people of walmart at home. *sigh*

Blip! Blip! Bop!

Last night while watching TV and futzing around with FarmVille on FaceBook, I felt a little Blip!Blip! in my lower abdomen. I told Barry that I thought I just felt the baby and he says, "Shouldn't you know when you feel the baby?" That made me second guess myself. (Jerk.) But this morning, while sitting here at work, I felt it again. So I went downstairs to the branch, where one of my co-workers is due in November. I explained what i felt and she said "YEP!"

WOOT!!! Yay, Baby Girl!

What I thought was interesting was that for the last 3 weeks, I was trying what everyone told me to try: To lie in bed or on the couch and just relax. So there I've been, concentrating on my baby bump hoping that I could will her to kick me. It never worked. When I did feel her, I was sitting up on the couch, kind of hunched over the laptop that sits on our coffee table. Same with today - sitting up at my desk at work. It's never really in the same exact place twice, so she's a little swimmer. OMG, I just love her so much. Its rediculous! I've never even met her yet!

Just another step that makes her and this all the more real - and just another level of excitement for me - I can't wait to meet her!!!!

Update: I'm just so excited i can't concentrate on the procedures i should be writing right now at work. I never wanted to be kicked in the gut so badly in my life!! HA! Oh, Baby Girl. You just make me want to dance a jig I'm so excited for you!

Gesundheit!

I have been sneezing every day since being pregnant. I learned through the miracle of the Internet that it's a very common 'symptom' of pregnancy called Pregnancy Rhinitis. Who-da-thunk?

Well, last night Barry and I are laying on the couch (foot-to-foot, to give you a picture ;))watching TV when I feel a sneeze coming on. I do a sit-up (to avoid the obligatory piddle otherwise), cover my mouth and sneeze. Barry goes "EWWWWW!!!" Thinking I sneezed on him, i say "SORRY... I covered my mouth!" He said, "It wasn't the sneeze - your belly was against my leg!"

Seriously??!?

He was creeped out because 'it was all hard and stuff'. What a freakin' wuss. He has yet to touch my tummy. Just wait till this kid starts kicking. He better touch my belly then!

People of Wal-Mart

I can tell this is going to be the cause of aLOT of workplace slacking in my future.

http://peopleofwalmart.com/

I'd say this is the best website I've come across in quite a long time. Please, click the link. I want to share the enjoyment with you. Come back after and tell me your favorite.

PS, here's a sneak peak:

Growth Spurt?

This morning I woke up to start my morning ritual: Turn off the alarm, roll out of bed, walk the 4-5 steps to the toilet, pee, turn on the shower, wake up gradually under a hot stream of water. This morning I woke up fairly quicker when I noticed some pink on my TP. AH! It wasn't a lot, so I didn't freak out. I pulled out my "What to Expect" Book, and didn't feel too worried when I didn't have any pain associated with it. So I took my shower as usual and called the Doctor when I got out. (Its so nice when he answers the phone.) He said just to keep an eye on it and to not have sex for a few days, then give him a call. Then he said "I'll feel better when you feel the baby move." UGH. Great. NOW I'm worrying! Sure, I've been anxious to feel her, but I saw her moving on the ultrasound just last Tuesday, and heard her heartbeat at a strong 153 on Friday, so I've been OK with it. I am a little overweight, so according to my books and websites, it's usual to not feel fetal movement right now, sometimes until 26 weeks. (I'm at 19.) But when the Doctor says he's worried, shouldn't I worry too? And now, of course, I'm wondering if every little twinge is more than it is. Meh. I'm going to do my best to not be stressed about it, since he didn't make me come in, or even tell me to lay down for the day or anything. Stress is not good for a baby. This is me, not stressed.

One thing I've felt the last 3 days now, is that even if I eat or drink the smallest meal, I feel like I just ate Thanksgiving Dinner. All of it. My stomach and sides are super tight (above my ute) and all I want to do is lay down. Saturday I mentioned to Barry that I thought she must have had a huge growth spurt or something because I felt SO tight (but again, not at my uterus, but above and around it). Its like she's growing faster than my body can compensate. To all my other mothers out there: is this normal, too? I did mention this to Dr. Raspa, too, and he didn't seem to make a deal out of it.

The Registry

On Saturday Barry spent the rainy afternoon in Babies R Us with a gun. A scanning gun that is. We picked out everything from my breast pump to our stroller system to our bedding to Every. Little. Thing. In between. By the time we got home, 4 plus hours later, saying we were exhausted was an understatement. We heated up some left overs and vegged in front of the TV. By 10:00, I woke up from the couch and migrated to the bed, not bothering to even take my hair out of my ponytail. I woke up again at about 1:15 (to pee of course) and noticed that Barry was still in the living room. I yelled to him "I can't believe you're still awake!" Not a minute later he was next to me. Apparently he fell asleep on the couch too (TV, computer and lights still on). We both woke up the next day about 9:00. I slept for 11 hours!! I haven't done that in I don't know how long. Goes to show that making decisions really is tiring. That plus growing a baby can really wear you out I guess. ;)

On a side note, a few of my friends/family had taken notice to our Registry and made some comments on our 'over-abundance' of scanned items. In my defense, Barry held the gun the whole time and he even admitted that if it said "A Must Have for Parents!" on the label, he scanned it. (Hence the baby timer thingy on the registry - what does it do that a normal timer doesn't? We have no idea.) Also, we fell prey to the New Parent Syndrome that Babies R Us love to spread by giving you a checklist that has everything under the sun on it. Luckily, Angelle set me straight on a few things, and as the weeks and months pass, I'm sure I'll be updating it with more or less of the necessities and less of the thermometers (Apparently we had at least 5 different ones scanned. OOPS.)

My Front Porch Looking In

My radio at work was tuned to the country station today. I typically listen to "lite work favorites" but for whatever reason it didn't want to come in. I love most country music and although many lesser fans think it's all shotguns and dead dogs, the majority of the songs are full of beautiful lyrics about love. Not just romantic love, but songs about family, patriotism, and the love for the finer things in life. I just finished listening to "Front Porch Looking In" by Lonestar. From Wikipedia: The song describes how the sight of his beautiful wife and two adorable children is far better than anything including his "panoramic view" of his estate or "the paintings from the air, brushed by the hand of God." He also describes that after seeing the whole world, he "can't wait to get back home to the one He made for me."

As the song ended, I realized that I'm going to be a part of this privileged club all too soon. I've watched from the outside for so long and it wasn't until just now that I realized how much I was missing. She's not even born yet and I already understand why it's worth writing a song about. I am so overwhelmed with joy that I will experience that love. Not just imagine it, but truly feel it and experience it. Its more anticipation than high school prom, that first roller coaster, or my first kiss put together, yet its so calming. I know now that I was born to be in this club. To be a parent. My wallet may not be ready, but my heart sure as hell is. Bring it on.

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice...

...that's what little GIRLS are made of!!

That's right, She's a SHE! I can't say I was super surprised, since I've had the feeling of a girl the whole time.

A common question everyone asked me was "What do you want it to be?" I always gave the PC answer of "As long as its healthy, i don't care" and I was pretty sure I meant it. After seeing her on the ultrasound and realizing that all her parts were in the right place and growing at the right place, it really confirmed what I had been saying the whole time. I am just SOOO grateful that I could see each individual bone in her fingers, all in the right places. Everything looked perfect and she even gave us a big "thumbs up" at one point. :) I'll post the picture when I remember to scan them. :)

So, thank you to everyone for their well wishes. Now that i know she's a she, it's all the more real. Now I keep picturing the 3 year old version of her. I can see her long flowing black/brown hair and beautiful blue eyes. I'm praying for her daddy's complexion... and if she's lucky, she'll have the mailman's nose. :)

Baby Girl, I can't wait to meet you!!

Sugar 'n' Spice or Snakes 'n' Snails?

If all goes well, we will know the sex of Little Cashew today!!! Our appointment is at 2:45. It's my first major ultrasound (the only other one was a quick 'hi' as a favor from my Doctor) so i don't know quite what to expect. I'm utterly excited, though. It's 12:06 according to my clock on my computer at work. I'm doing my best to get what I can done between moments of just wishing and praying that 2:15 would come quickly so i can head out and SEE my BABY! And HOPEFULLY see his or her little wang (or lack there of).

I was reading about Old Wives Tales yesterday to figure out what they would say the sex would be. According to a quiz collaborating many famous OWTs, we've got a 74% chance of a girl. One OWT made me chuckle, though... a grandmother was talking to her pregnant granddaughter. She said if you're crabby during your pregnancy, its a girl because all girls are crabby and if you have a girl you're twice as so. If you're happy during your pregnancy, it's a boy because you have a 'peter' in you for 9 months! LOL! Gotta love spunky Grandmas. *sigh* I miss mine... I wish she could meet her newest Great Grand baby. But that's another blog...

12:14... SO CLOSE!

Grandpa's 80th Birthday Party

I haven't made that much time on blogger as I used to, which has caused me to slack on my 'everyday posts'. Things like what i do over the weekend or a funny thing my nephew says always seem to be forgotten by the time i finish reading all the blogs I keep up with. SO, before I let life get in the way again, I just have to tell you what I got to do last weekend. :)

About 2 or 3 weeks ago Barry's Dad offered us (out of the blue) some money for a vacation. I was so grateful, but said I'd rather take the money and pay down some bills. Then I remembered that my Grandpa's 80th birthday party was right around the corner, and that I REALLY wanted to go, so we told Barry's Dad that we would take him up on his offer if he enjoyed the time with us. He agreed and the quick planning went underway. In a few days, I had to shop for the best deals, and then get 3 airline tickets, a rental car, and sleeping accommodations squared up. (I not so secretly love doing that stuff.) So a week before our trip we were settled to go.

We flew from Jax to Chicago's Midway airport and arrived about 9am Thursday morning. We decided to spend the day in Chicago, since, in the 76 years of Morty's (Barry's Dad) life, he's never been to Chicago. Our first stop, of course, was Chinatown for a yummy dim sum breakfast. Then we decided to drive around downtown a bit and check out "the Bean" (one of my favorite spots in Chi-town), then go down Lake Shore Drive to the Field Museum (Chicago's Natural History Museum). We were there from about 11-5 and only got through the top floor of the Field's 3 floors of exhibits. They had an AMAZING exhibit on the history of the earth (from 4.5 BILLION years ago to today) that took up most of the day, but that's because Barry's a earth-science freak and had to read EVERY. SINGLE. THING. I walked ahead and sat a lot. ;) From there it was rush hour and I didn't feel like driving in Chicago's traffic, so we headed BACK to Chinatown for a YUMMY dinner at our favorite noodle house.

Some pics from the museum:

The Field Museum

Mandi Pirate. ARRRRR!

Me, Capt PegLeg, and Barry

Nice Bone!

We got to my Grandpa's about 7 or 8 and got to spend some time with family before it was bedtime for them. For some reason, Barry, Morty, and I stayed up until midnight playing Thirteen Wild, which is the resident card game in the Hart Family (kind of like rummy). We had to teach Morty if he was going to be able to hang. :) By 11:30, we had been up for WAY too long (about 20 hours) so we started to get the sillies and knew it was time for bed.

Before I go on, most people who read this blog know how much I LOVE my Grandpa. My Grandpa is probably my favorite person on this planet. (and yes, I'm including Barry). He's the kindest, gentlest man in the world who has more love in his heart for family than anyone I've ever met. Anyone that's met him can attest to this as well. :) If I could, I'd make sure that everyone I loved had the chance to meet him and experience his huge leprechaun smile.

Back to the weekend: Friday we had to get everything ready for the party. My Aunt was expecting about 100 people, both friends and family, from across the country, so there was a lot to be done. (there was even a port-a-potty delivered!) The tents were set up, the Cornhole games set out (and what my Uncle Buzz calls Testicle Toss), and the beer and liquor were put out and on ice. The morning went by way too fast, and it was time to drive to Milwaukee to pick up my Dad from the airport. Before doing that, we stopped by the Milwaukee Museum of Art and got some cool pictures of my favorite building in Milwaukee:

My attempt at an 'artsy' shot. :)

Across the bridge, looking back

Inside, looking up.

Everyday, at noon and 5:00pm, the "sails" of the museum open and close. This is a mid-way shot.

After the museum closed, we had dinner at a great German place called Maders, and then picked up my dad and headed back to my Grandpa's house.

On to the Big Day! Grandpa's ACTUAL birthday was Monday, the 31st, but we celebrated on Saturday. People started trickling in about 10:45am and staying until about midnight. There was fun, games, lots of laughter, and LOTS of beer. It also ended up being one of the coldest days in the month of August for the area. I don't think it hit close to 70 the whole day. So, by 5 or so, the bonfire was lit and the bags of marshmallows were ravaged. :) I didn't get as many pictures as I probably should have, but here's a few:

The Cake (Courtesy of Lovin' Oven Cakery)

The Backyard (AKA Party Central)

The Booze (no, I did not partake)

My Dad, Cousin Stephanie ("Stevie") and Father In Law, Morty

The Bonfire (after it's died down quite a bit)

Mama Irene and Dad (Mama was my Grandma's best friend since like the '40s)

Aunt Karene (Grandpa's youngest) and The Man Himself

Cousin Robbie and his niece Neveah (and she's a DOLL!)

Uncle Harry, making his grand entrance, riding an Ice Cream truck down the driveway. It's becoming a tradition for him to hi-jack one each year :)

It was a great trip that went by way too quickly. Happy Birthday, Grandpa!

17 Week Randomness

Apparently, Cashew is starting to hear now. I wonder what that's like. I mean your whole world is quiet, then all of a sudden there's a whole new sense to explore. I know that it's gotta be scary. From that, I wonder what his/her first sounds were. Was it my voice? a burp? a fart? I wish it was something we could document, like their first words. Its interesting, when I first learned about him/her, I talked to my belly and I knew he/she couldn't hear anything. Now that i know that he/she can, i haven't found myself able to say something. I'm hoping its because I haven't been alone with my belly yet, and I don't want to appear crazy talking to myself.

A week from today, at 2:45, is our ultrasound appointment. HOPEFULLY, if Cashew cooperates, he or she will show us their junk and I won't have to say "he/she" anymore! I really think she's a girl, which is why he's probably a boy. If we do have a girl, the poor thing may end up just being named "Baby Girl Swedlow" because her parents couldn't decide on a name. Barry will not listen to anything except Iylana ("ill-ana"). I thought it was pretty our first night we found out we were pregnant and he's taking that as law that I liked the name, so he doesn't see why I don't want it now. I really like Ella, especially thinking that was a compromise for Iylana, but he thinks it sounds like an old person name. Grrr.... Maybe we'll just let her name herself, like Picabo Street. (OK, as i posted the link, i learned that she didn't name herself, but was named after a small Idaho town. Geez)

According to a book or 2, i should be 5-10 pounds heavier by now. Although I look like I've gained 15 pounds, I don't think i've gained more than 1 or 2 pounds, if any. Hopefully I'm not starving the kid.

Barry continues to be sweet as can be. In fact, I make more fat jokes than he does. I'm surprisingly less sensitive about it, and he's surprisingly more sensitive about it. Once he called me "Hot Mama" and i thought he said "Fat Mama". I thought it was funny, but he was appalled that I even thought he would say something like that. My hubby never ceases to surprise me. :)

Weight Watchers Dessert Recipe

I had this dessert at a friends house last week and she just emailed me the recipe. It is SO GOOD!!

WW Cinnamon Crisps with Honey (Sopapillas) 3 points

4 (8 inch) fat free flour tortillas
Butter flavored cooking spray
2 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
2 tablespoons honey
Directions:
Preheat oven to 350. Stack tortillas, cut into four wedges, separate wedges and place in a single layer on a large baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
Combine sugar and cinnamon. Sprinkle wedges with sugar mixture. Drizzle on honey
Bake at 350 for 15 minutes or until golden and crisp.
Yield: 4 servings, (4 wedges each)

WW Ginger Fruit Salsa 0 points (Gotta love that!)

1 ½ cups coarsely chopped cantaloupe
1 cup chopped pineapple
½ cup dried cranberries
¼ cup chopped fresh mint
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1 teaspoon grated peeled fresh ginger
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and finely chopped
Directions:
Combine all ingredients in a medium bowl, tossing gently. Let stand at least five minutes before serving.
Yield: 12 servings (1/4 cup serving size)

OPTIONS: Robin added extra ginger, pineapple, and cranberries and I thought it was delicious.

Use the sopapillas as your 'chips' and enjoy!! It's got a kick w/ the ginger and jalapenos, but its so satisfying and delicious.

14 Weeks and Counting

Friday we had our monthly check up. The VERY first thing Dr. Raspa says to me after our hello's is "You know, it's OK to color your hair - it doesn't absorb into your skin." LOL! I guess my roots are getting pretty bad. So, time for a trip to CVS now that I know it's safe.Here's some other things that went on:
~We listened to the heartbeat again. He/She is going strong and swimming like a fish! Every time he got a good read, you'd hear it quickly fade away, like Cashew was playing with us. At one point we heard a bit THUMP! and was told that it was a kick. SO COOL!
~Between my last appointment and this one, I actually lost a pound! The Dr. was OK with this and very satisfied by my weight. Because I'm a little hefty anyway, he doesn't want me to gain as much as what my book say. Now that my appetite is growing, I'm going to have to be better about keeping that in check. I want to eat every few hours!
~My next appointment is September 8th, which is our ultrasound! Hopefully we'll find out the sex. I can't wait! (Then we can go "shopping" and register!)

Yesterday as I was in the shower, I felt my baby bump! Not the fatness that has been there for a few weeks, but the actual hardish mound right above my pelvis. Its hard to see, but I can feel it. I tried to get Barry to feel it too, but he wasn't having it. He thinks its weird. Once this baby starts kicking, his ass better be willing to feel it, that's all I'm sayin'.
Today at work I want everyone to touch my belly! BUT, I know that 1 - they probably can't feel it yet (its a little bump) and 2- You can't feel it through my clothes yet. I don't think I'd be working here much longer if I kept asking people to put their hands down my pants. I'll restrain.

On another note, we got a crib and a pack n play! I am SOO grateful of my friends' generosity. My friend Jen's mom is moving and no longer needed the crib she had. I checked it out and was very happy with it. So what if it's not the exact one that I would want; a free crib is a gift from heaven. So Saturday I put it together and put it in its place in our spare bedroom er, i mean, the baby's room. (weird) When I was done, I caught Barry in the room just staring at the crib. It was kinda funny. Not even an hour after the crib was in place, we looked in and saw Harley (our Tuxedo cat) sleeping in it. It was so cute, but we don't want him to think that it's HIS place, or that the cats are even allowed inside. Any ideas on how to divert them? We thought about putting tin foil on the mattress. I did spray some vinegar water on the mattress in hopes that that will make them not want to be there. Any ideas will be greatly appreciated!
Also, a friend at work gave me her pack n play! I haven't put that together yet because I'm not sure exactly where I'm going to put it, but apparently its only a few years old and has the ability to be raised up for a changing table.

It's getting more and more real everyday. For the most part, I just think of the amazing-ness of having a baby. A person that Barry and I created. My dream of becoming a mother is coming true. A little package full of hugs and kisses. I can't wait to feel the love that is already beginning to grow for this little nut. I can't wait for the power of a mother's love when they need a booboo kissed. (I could go on and on...) But the other parts are making it REALLY real. How will we afford this? Who will take care of them after I go back to work? How will we afford this?? What if something horrible happens? What if they grow up to be a douche bag? I'm sure those 15 year old girls don't think about those things when they go on Maury Povich. I'm 29 and I never really thought about it until now. It's scary. But at the same time, I can't worry. I know that our support system is amazing and that this child will never want for anything.

An Unfinished Post... I Think?

I've been meaning to post about this, but of course, I kept forgetting.

My memory has been SUCKing since I've been pregnant. I mean, its not great usually, but this is ridiculous. My sister says that I will never be as smart as the day I found out I was pregnant, and you just get stupider with every kid. Great...

• I almost left the house without shoes
• I'm always saying "left" when I mean "right", and vice versa
• ...

OK, so i started this post with a list of damn things I forgot to do, and now I can't remember them. Lawdy!! (<--Like the black lady from Alix's Larry's flight)

Random

So i was just looking at these pictures and noticed... That guy must have a little Captain in him. Ya think?

(Can you tell i'm out-of-my-mind bored at work?)

Barry's Coming Around

I've really done my best to not overload Barry with baby stuff. He probably would beg to differ. But I'm enjoying watching him warm up to the fact that a baby is coming. Don't get me wrong, I'm still warming up to the idea, but I think it's a bit easier for me than him. But I've caught him in 2 remarks that make me flutter inside with smiles...

This weekend I stared at my messy house and kept thinking "how are we going to bring a baby into this world with our messy habits." I think I even mentioned to Barry that we need to keep the house clean because soon it's going to be filled with the baby's crap. Finally Sunday I was OVER the kitchen looking like a shit-pot mess. It still had days-old dishes in the sink, after I washed all of his messy dishes from his brother's visit on Wednesday. I was feeling the whole: "I work all day then come home to THIS and have to clean before I can even think about cooking something for myself and my baby is probably starving...gripe gripe gripe..." Sorry. Back to Sunday... SO, on Sunday when it looked like he would much rather watch House on DVD after I asked him to help me clean, I said "F-it" and started doing it without him. He kept asking me to stop and go to the couch to snuggle with him. I'm like "NO, shit needs to get done, snuggling is not going to make it cleaner." He insisted that if I gave him 2 minutes that he would clean the whole kitchen for me. I gave in, even though I was NOT in the mood. When I laid next to him, he hugged me and said "I don't want to see you get all worked up like that, it's not good for the baby. I'm sorry I let the kitchen get like that..." I really tried to resist breaking my bad mood, but he worked his wiles and I just couldn't help but feel good when he seemed truly concerned for the baby.

Then yesterday, while he was cooking the YUMMY filling for our enchiladas, I asked him why he didn't use the flavor packet. He said "I put my own spices in so I know exactly what's going into my wife and my baby." He said my baby. It was the first time I heard him say that. He's the kind of guy that is more inclined to call the baby "it" than "baby".
I enjoyed the moment and gave him a kiss.

Another Step Forward

I gave up today. My pants don't fit anymore and my tops are too small. I've done the 'hair tie trick' to extend my pants and, for the first time, I'm wearing a maternity top to work today.

...and I think I look super cute :)

A friend/co-worker has promised me 2 trashbags FULL of maternity clothes and I can't WAIT to raid them!